Free at Last

Everything is negotiable here. There are no steady rules. They change on a whim. I'm a little worried that my fixer isn't going to fix anything for me. His only job before we met was to secure transportation from Bangkok to Mae Sot and lodging. He did neither. His only plan to get me in the camps is to talk his way in. He has no contacts. I think he talked himself into a job that he can't handle. Crap! Well he at least speaks Thai so he will work as an over priced translator till I can figure out what to do next. I am now paying 100 baht extra per person for the bus because the only ones left are V.I.P. The trip is around 8 hours and we are about 2/3 of the way through it and we stop at what I assume is a station to let people off. All of a sudden almost everyone starts piling off the bus so I pack up my things thinking we have arrived and head off the bus. As I descend the stairs, the steward lady starts yelling at me, "No. No. No. You stay. You go back on." So I schlemp my crap back up the stairs and sit back down a bit confused. My inept fixer comes down afterwards and tells me that all those people who got off the bus are Burmese and illegal and have been taken off at a border check point. Well now there's a shot right. Nope. We are driving away as he is telling me this. Too late. Can I fire him before we even get there. I'm thinking about it. He's not cheap. He should be better than this. Grrrrrrr.....Well, I guess we can sleep easy now that we are free of Burmese illegals. We set off into the sunrise towards Mae Sot- 90% empty.

I smell a story in the air! For real- the ASPCA would have a field day with this place. So many homeless dogs and cats looking for their next big handout. It's strange cuz they are really sweet and friendly. They aren't mean or aggressive. They crawl in and out of stores and restaurants and no one blinks an eye. So cute and fluffy and disease ridden. Anyone know anyone who wants a pet? I can find them one no problem-o. They are very adept at avoiding the harsh traffic here as well. These people make my driving style look like an old ladies. I know that only the people who have been in a car with me know what I'm talking about, but take my word for it- I am no kitten of a driver. My introduction to it began when my cab driver from the airport fell asleep at the wheel and kept swerving into other peoples lanes. No one honks to tell him he's driving like an ass. They just accept it. Insurance must be crazy high here if they even have any at all. The laws here are really lax. I mean I don't have an International drivers license, but I can rent a car or motorcycle- no problem. But if I wreck it- I pay for it. No problem. I must admit at this point that I'm a little home sick and ready to leave here and begin my project. I am waiting on my fixer who won't be ready to roll till tomorrow.

Hippie like me

I wandered out of my hotel room today determined to find the huge weekend market the locals call JJ. It also has some super Asian name that I can't pronounce. My goal is to find some non-farang clothing. All smells aside, the market is a shoppers dream. Ok, maybe not the Paris Hilton types. But the cheap, thrift store shopping types. You can find any and everything here from the latest Diesel clothing to a new addition to your household- a real live pet. Every price is negotiable. You start low, they start high and you meet somewhere super cheap in the middle. I'm determined to find some hippie clothing since everyone stares at me and I keep getting harassed for my money. It's not like my Western clothing is different than theirs. They dress just as fashionable as us, if not more. But if I dress in some frumpy smocks I think they may overlook me rather than stare so much. After getting lost in the maze of vendors several times and almost passing out from heat exhaustion, I finally had 4 bags full of clothes my boyfriend would love. Long flowing skirts and crumpled, loose tank tops with spaghetti straps. You know comfy like a Phish concert. As I walk home from the market I am left with images of craziness flooding my mind. The sights and sounds of that place are worth a million bucks alone. I guess no matter how far you travel, you will never be able behind Avril Lavine (sp?). Or Kanye West. Or Gwen Stephanie. The trendy hipsters here try to emulate punk and all the popular trends. As you pass by their booths, you are engulfed by th to leavee sounds of crappy pop music. As I walk away knowing that Fergie Ferg will love me long time, I head home for a shower because I smell like a baboon. I change into my new clothes and go for a walk. As I walk down the street I realize that it worked. The hassle factor has been cut in half. Same old shirt- different new skirt- makes me look a little Asian. Score!

forgot to post pic

Scared Stacie

Note** These are not in real time since I don't have access or time to update everyday. They are, however, in chronological order for the most part.

Totally overwhelmed is my state of mind at this moment. I moved from a really nice hotel to a hostel and it rocks. It's very tranquil and serene, not to mention cheap. I think it works out to be like $12 a night. As I left my hotel with my suitcase in tote, I realized how much like a foreigner I must look. Not more than 2 minutes later, I come across an English speaking Asian "guide" who wants to help me find whatever I need. I'd been warned about scam artists who like to prey on tourists so I just kept walking. I guess he didn't have much else to do since he continued to follow me asking, "What do you need? I find." I finally had to turn around and tell him to leave me alone- very firmly. He got the picture all right. It sure does suck to be a minority. Yeah, I know your all shaking your heads in agreement. But for real- I'm like one of 3 white people in a 10 block radius. This city is really intimidating. Not because it's huge and confusing- tho that doesn't help. It's mostly because I'm this huge walking dollar sign to most of these people. Every time I round a corner, someone wants to sell me something. That part I can handle. It's the part where they keep on me because I'm very clearly American. I think it's my blond hair. Whatever it is, every time I round the corner there is an Asian dude out to scam my American dollars. American. It's not a phrase I would normally use to describe myself, but here, that is what I am. Or farang- which means foreigner in Thailand. Really, just check out these sandals. Jut And the worst revelation about all this is that most Americans deserve the hounding. They are stupid and rich compared to the rest of the world. They have earned this reputation and mostly deserve it. Now I have to prove that I'm different. As in not stupid and gullible. I think I need to learn Thai.

On a lighter note, I finally broke down and ate Thai food. I've been avoiding it like the plague since I'm freaked out about getting sick. I've mostly been eating 1x a day at the hostel's free breakfast. It's pretty safe with bread and croissants being the main thing on the menu. Oh yeah, the Thai food. Is it good here? Ummmm.....hell yeah!

Come on- you'd be afraid of food like the specimen above if it sat out all day!

U.A. Flight 837 Tokyo to Bangkok

Let me just start by saying that United flights suck overseas! Small seats, shitty service, awful movies......grrrr. I suppose it's not helping matters that I haven't slept in 2 days if you count the whole day I lost on the way here. Believe me, it's not for lack of trying. Images of disturbing news keep flooding my mind. Images of Burmese being gunned down on their own streets, by their own government. Images of blood, red and thick, trickling down the asphalt in to the sewer grates. Real blood. Not like the kind you see in the movies, you know, the fake ketchup looking kind. Maybe it wouldn't bother me so much if I wasn't so intertwined with this crisis. I mean really- I have seen it up close and personal before. Maybe it's because my camera wasn't there to separate me from the gruesomeness of it all. At this point, I feel like I couldn't have picked my dates more perfectly if I were psychic. Maybe it upsets me so much because a Japanese photojournalist (who probably felt the same as I about this cause) was gunned down like a toy. Gunned down and and he keeps shooting. Yep, crazy as I for sure. I think sometimes we photogs think we are invincible since we get carte blanch most of the time. The camera covering my face doesn't protect me from death and destruction. I just hope they didn't get his footage.

Tokyo

Damn....I'm reading blogger in Japanese and I don't speak Japanese and posted to the wrong blog....let's try this again.

So I'm having sushi in Tokyo on my layover because you can't come to Japan and not have sushi, right?! The guy to my left at the bar just happens to have come out of Bangkok so we start chatting. Conversation turns to Myanmar and he tells me that news outlets are reporting that a Japanese photojournalist has been shot and killed covering the protests in Myanmar. Freak me right out! They also have unconfirmed reports that a German journalist was also shot and killed. Things are getting really crazy over there to say the least. My biggest concern is that the Jaunta is going to close the borders and I'm gonna get fucking stuck over there. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. I picked this place months ago as I thought it wasn't going to be such a horrific situation I was putting myself into- I'm rethinking that thought. Here's some links is anyone is interested:

http://www.lightstalkers.org/photographer-dies-in-burma-protests

http://www.bangkokpost.net/topstories/topstories.php?id=122094

A few minutes after I sat down to type this and I hear my name being called from next to me. The idea that I am where I need to be in life couldn't be much clearer if it punched me in the face. The girl next to me is an activist I met in Chicago last week during a protest. Crazy, crazy small world! What are the odds of that?!

I feel so close and so far away at the same time!